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Who or Whom am I referring to? Man or Woman?
He says, “You are so stupid and not smart enough to make that business succeed.”
She says, “The last time I asked you to do one simple thing, you screwed up.” “You are always screwing up. That’s why you are not getting a promotion.”
He says, “Take that back—you don’t know what you are talking about—you’re on your smart phone all day but not even smart enough to use it.” He yells, “at least I have a job and I support you and keep a roof over your head. You do my laundry and that’s it. I could take it to the laundromat. Sometimes my underwear comes out pink. You can’t even do that right.”
She shouts, “Maybe you should wear pink underwear—you’re not man enough to climb the company ladder.”
Man—“OK if that’s the way you feel, go out and get a job and support me and the kids—I quit.”
Woman—“You make me feel so worthless, maybe I can’t get a job, but maybe I can start my own business where I am in control—then I won’t feel so stupid—I quit.”
What is each saying to the other? What does “I quit” mean? Which person, man or woman feels the most verbally abused? Is each, man or woman, likely to physically abuse? Do you know the answer? I don’t.
Each man or woman feeling worthless and angry can seek help from the Violence Intervention Project. We don’t have all of the answers, but can try to lead you down a pathway to help restore your feelings of worth. We’re always there to support Man or Woman.
Reach out Call 920-837-2424.
Donna Thomas is a board member with Violence Intervention Project of Algoma.